Boudoir Showed Me My Inner Queen

Boudoir is scary! There, I said it. Boudoir is vulnerable. It is trusting your insecurities to someone who has the power to bring that which you try to hide into the spotlight. If you’re anything like me, there were at least one hundred reasons in my mind as to why this would be a bad idea:

What if he doesn’t like them? You haven’t lost the baby weight yet. What if your ideas look stupid?

Originally, my intentions behind this shoot were designed for another; my husband. I figured I would power through, what I was anticipating to be, an outrageously awkward photo session in an effort to provide him with pictures he’d (hopefully) enjoy.

In a series of conversations with my photographer who not only matched my excitement, but also elevated my self-confidence in being able to see this through, we established a game plan. Come session day, my nerves were enough to turn the car around. This isn’t me; I don’t do this sort of thing. Walking into that studio was already a push to my comfort zone.

Then something happened that I couldn’t have anticipated: she showed me a preview picture. Oh my God, that’s me?! The realization came from a place, not of disgust, but of a rekindling love. It came from a place of empowering confidence and this feeling of sexiness, I am afraid, I let get away from me after babies became a part of the equation. From that preview on, I was able to call on my inner queen. I’d finally found her!

I went into that photo shoot convincing myself I was there for my husband. Quick like a band-aid I will just get this over with. I left there with a new love of myself. Please don’t ever forget, the most important person in that photo shoot is looking right back at you in the mirror. You deserve to see yourself shine.

Photographer Credit: Jordan Cigelske | J. Tay Photography | Instagram: j.tayphotography

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